Wednesday 6 May 2015

Being a Step Father

Much is made of Wicked Stepmothers in the movies. Cinderella had one,  Sleeping beauty etc.

Step fathers on the other hand get it easy. Well at least from Disney's point of view. It's not that stepmothers are wicked per se and stepfathers aren't. I'm guessing it is just a caricature of the relationship between a daughter and her father, and his new wife. 
There don't seem to be any movies that focus on a new father! Not that I can recall anyway. Feel free to correct me if I'm wrong.

Herself's boys are hitting puberty and I seem to be getting the brunt of it. These past few weeks, they will do nothing I ask them to do. If I give out to them or correct them I get cheek and smartness.

The younger (10) has taken to saying. "You can't tell me what to do. You're not my father!" Now I know he does not mean this, and is just saying it to hurt me. It still hurts. Especially when his father has nothing to do with him at all. No cards or presents for birthdays, holidays etc.

 I was adopted and remember thinking the same things when I was being punished as a child. So I guess it is a rite of passage all parents who raise children not their own must go through.

It is though very hard to remain calm. Some days I have to forgo punishment until herself returns home. Otherwise it just escalates.

 I take comfort from the fact that if he was my natural son he would be telling me he hates me or something else. One day when they are older and wiser I am sure they will thank me. For now it's counting to 10 and some days 20.


  1. Nice post about being a stepfather! I agree one day they will be thankful! Hang in there :)

    1. Thanks for reading and commenting. We've now reached the "Your son gets away with everything!" Stage.

  2. Lovely post, I always joke I am the 'wicked' stepmum but the boys say I am not :).