Saturday, 2 May 2015

Milestones you won't find in a parents handbook.

As herself will tell you I'm very laid back in my parenting and not very competitive at all.

I'm not one to compete with other Dad's over how quick #BabyPink slept all night, ( She wakes once or twice between 9pm and 6.30 am), when she first rolled over, ( 9 1/2 weeks) walking, talking etc.

There are some milestones I do take notice off and she hit one of these the other day, which reminded me of some she has done and, others, that we have to look forward to.

  • Hand in the poop - This was the milestone we reached last week. Nappy was undone and straight away hand in the poop. Yeah! As if kicking legs weren't enough to contend with now we have to watch the hands as well
  • Pooping on the parent - She mastered this one fairly early on. You all know how it works. They appear to be finished. Nappy comes off bum cleaned, then in those few seconds it takes to get a clean nappy under them. A bit more poop flies onto the jeans. Or the bonus point effort, onto the hand as you go to apply Sudocream.
  • Peeing on the parent - Again she took to this one like the proverbial duck to water. Same as the poop one above but a wee instead. Fingers crossed I've gotten away lightly with both of these, so far.
  • Sick on the shoulder - No matter how big a towel or other covering, she can still get sick onto my shoulder. I'm sure its premeditated as I can spend 20 minutes tapping the back with her on my knees. Nothing, not even a tiny burp. Onto the shoulders with a bath towel covering me. A burp I'd be proud of after downing a can of cheap lager, errupts. A tiny bit of baby sick on the towel, even more on me. In such a place I can't see it!
  • Loosing a sock/shoe - I covered an incident of sock loss here. Any child can lose a sock or shoe when being carried. The art form is to do it from an impossible situation. Like when asleep!

There are others she hasn't reached yet. Throwing food on you, the floor, the dog, etc. Undoing the straps on car seat or stroller. Insisting we walk somewhere, only to state she is too tired, after getting just far enough away from the house to make going back for the buggy a chore. 

What milestones has your little one passed, that won't be found in the handbooks!


  1. Think I definitely mastered the getting poo'ed on one! Thanks for linking up #bigfatlinky

  2. Ha ha yes you defiantly mastered that one